Parenthood as an Opportunity to Mature: A Questionnaire to Detect Changes in Self-image and Relationships

Introduction: Parenthood is a composite experience in which personal, couple, relational, environmental, historical and cultural variables interact. In recent years, western societies have experienced a steady downward trend in the birth rate. On the other hand, scientific contributions, in which a qualitative methodology prevails, highlight the tendency of this experience to be positive. There is therefore an interest in exploring this topic in greater depth, also with quantitative studies, but above all in highlighting what changes, or maturing, happens in adults, sometimes after the birth of their children. Objectives: Our study aims to investigate parenthood through the administration of an ad hoc questionnaire. In particular, we investigate the psycho-relational changes that the experience of parenthood (after at least 3 years) may have promoted in women and men, specifically with respect to self-perception and relationships, both with their own parents, within the couple, and in object relations in general, and we compare the evaluations of mothers and fathers. Method: With prior permission and written informed consent, the self-report was distributed in various kindergartens. The sample consisted of 326 subjects, of whom187 mothers and 139 fathers, residing in northern Italy. Results: Three main components emerged from the factor analysis of the questionnaire: Openness Factor, Castling or Closure Factor, and Depth Factor. The reliability statistic indicates a Cronbach's alpha of 0.74. According to our sample parenthood promotes positive changes; among these, the most widespread are an increase in tenderness (92,7%), sense of responsibility (89,1%), perception of feeling older and more capable (88,4%), gratitude towards their partner (81.5%), and perception of a strengthening of the couple bond (86,5%). Increased tenderness and gratitude are particularly significant indicators of mental functioning. Other changes present more articulated distributions, and it is interesting to note that the direction of change fostered by parenthood is not unique and does not follow a fixed rule. Conclusions: Parenthood can open a time window in which greater plasticity and readiness to change are possible. Parenthood is therefore a precious opportunity (but not a certainty) to promote a growth in maturity for adults.